How to Help Your Child Be Successful in School

Brian Ledtke: Hello and welcome back to another edition of EdChoice Chats. I’m Brian Ledtke, and I’m on the communications team at EdChoice, and we’re in Rome actually today at the International School Choice and Reform Conference, and I’m joined with some special guests today. I’ll have them each introduce themselves.

We’re going to be talking today about parent support and how it creates student success. But first, Colleen, you can start first and introduce yourself.

Colleen Hroncich: All right. Thank you so much, Brian, for having us on. I’m Colleen Hroncich, and I am a policy analyst at the Cato Institute’s Center for Educational Freedom where I do a lot of work on school choice and kind of innovative educational models like micro schools, homeschool support, things like that.

And I was also a homeschooling mom myself, so I’ve come at this from both sides of it.

Lauren May: Hey, Brian, my name’s Lauren May. I work at Step Up for Students, and I’ve been there for eight years, so I’ve worn a couple of different hats. Most recently, I was the head of the advocacy department where we worked with parents, school leaders and providers to ensure that the story of how the scholarships work and how effective they are got to the most important people, i.e. the media and our lawmakers. And now I’m serving as the vice president of the Federal Scholarship Tax Credit. So we’re preparing to implement that program in 2020. Really excited to be here and ciao from Rome.

Kimberlee Tucker: Hi, Brian. I am Kimberlee Tucker. I am the owner of the Homeschool Hive.

We are a retail store that sells curriculum, games, books, all things that homeschoolers might need. I also, the company also is a provider with Step Up for Students with our scholarships in the state of Florida. We’re a vendor.

And then we also, I have a team of 10 evaluators, which are Florida certified teachers who are also homeschool moms who offer choice navigation, consultations, testing and evaluations. Thank you for having me.

Brian Ledtke: Thank you all for being here. So before we dive into the kind of the core conversation, you all work with parents in different ways. And what drew you to this work in school choice initially?

Lauren May: So I was in college, go Gators, and decided to become a teacher. That was not my original path. And then I got a job at an inner city Catholic school after I graduated, teaching kindergarten in Jacksonville.

It was called St. Pius. And all of our students that attended there attended using a state scholarship. And so a few years later, I became the principal.

I was the principal there for five years. But I really saw the difference that a really great school made for those families that the only way they could attend that school was thanks to the state scholarship. So from there, I became a really strong advocate for the scholarship programs.

I work with our families and helped them advocate for the programs. And then I got a job at Step Up, where I’m now able to help over 500,000 kids access the best educational options for them. And so it’s been such an amazing journey for me, watching and knowing the kids that we’re affecting on a day to day basis.

Many of the kids that I taught kindergarten to are now in college or working, and I’m so proud of them. And every day that I go to work, I think about them and I think about how important it is that we serve kids like them and we remember them when we’re doing our day to day work.

Kimberlee Tucker: I fell into the world of homeschooling through my daughter. I am a Florida certified teacher and I was working in the school system. And my daughter is on the spectrum and she was having a really hard time acclimating to the public school life.

And she asked me if I would homeschool her. And I took a leap of faith and I did and went into this wonderful world of homeschooling and became an evaluator for children in Florida have to be evaluated every year as they homeschool by a Florida certified teacher, which led to the opening of the Homeschool Hive. And it has been a journey that I’m so grateful and thankful that I am on and continue to advocate for homeschool in the state of Florida and now the whole United States and the world, hopefully.

I can really thank you, Colleen.

Colleen Hroncich: Sure. It’s kind of similar in that it was my own experiences that got me here. I also homeschooled my kids.

I can’t say they asked me to, but eventually I think they mostly appreciated it. But I just saw the benefits to them of being able to pick and choose and follow their passions or when they’re struggling with something, they had more time, there’s just a lot of benefits to homeschooling, but also when you can have a community with it, like a hybrid school or homeschool co-ops, things like that. So then when I got back into the workforce in public policy, I was able to get into education.

And a lot of what I do is aimed at letting parents know about all these incredible options that are out there today, because so many just don’t know that even in states that have really robust scholarship programs. And also another fun thing is helping to reach teachers to let them know about this, because the unions are always telling teachers that school choice is bad for them, but reality shows that it’s really, really good for them.

Brian Ledtke: Well, thank you, everyone. The first question I really want to dive into here is, we hear all the time that parents are a child’s first teacher, they’re the best teacher for their own children. So what does that actually look like in practice?

Kimberlee Tucker: It’s different for every family, because within the family structure, it’s different within every child that’s in that structure. And even within different cases of the same. Exactly, exactly.

That’s why resources are so important. One of the things that we are talking about at this conference is how parent involvement can positively affect homeschool families. And one of the great offerings that we have in the state of Florida for parents that their children are on our scholarships, our ESAs, it’s called choice navigation.

And my team of evaluators, we offer this and we do hundreds of choice navigation sessions. Basically, it’s a fancy word for consultation. And we consult with families and we never tell the families you need to do XYZ because that’s not homeschooling.

And so we get to know the families. They tell us about their children, their learning styles, or we help them figure out what their child’s learning style is because maybe they don’t know. And through those, the choice navigation sessions, we come up with plans.

And then we have many clients, families who check in throughout the year. So they’ll make multiple appointments through the year for a check-in to make sure that, you know, we’re having this problem. Can you help us figure out what we can do?

Oh, yeah, sure. It sounds like your child might want to move into more of a hands-on kinesthetic learning style. So these are some of the options you can do.

Lauren May: And so I just want to jump in because this is one of the things that I love about Florida is that we allow the scholarship dollars to pay for choice navigation. But as a former principal, I did that on a daily basis with our families. So a family would come in and say, my kid is really struggling in math and I don’t know what to do.

What would you recommend? Or if a child was really struggling in school in general and they didn’t want to come or were refusing to come, how do you combat that? But I remember right when I got out of college, I was 22 working in this inner city school.

I was so nervous. I didn’t know what I was doing. And a parent came in and said, Miss May, I was the kindergarten teacher.

I need you to tell me, how do I get my kid to go to sleep at night? I don’t know how to put them on a schedule. And I’m like, OK, well, let me.

So it’s really amazing that we have so many options for our families, because in Florida, you can use your scholarship to go to private school. You can use it to homeschool. And so there’s so many.

And you can also even use it to do a hybrid, like homeschool for three days a week and go to a school two days a week. Or even you can spend the money to attend a public school class. So there’s so many different options, but it can be very overwhelming for parents.

And so what I’m thankful for are for people like Kimberlee and her whole team who help these families navigate and understand the best things to do, which is what traditionally our school principals and our teachers have been doing. But when you’re homeschooling, you’re more a little bit on your own. And so we have that option for our families.

Colleen Hroncich: I think one thing that parents need to realize is that homeschooling doesn’t mean schooling at home. There’s a lot more flexibility. The kids go to school.

They’re there seven or eight hours a day. Homeschooling might take two or three hours a day, and that gives you a lot more free time to do other fun things and for the kids to have time learning about whatever they’re really interested in. And that doesn’t mean that they’re skipping over all the work.

They’re so much more focused on it. And then you really have time to, you know, if your child has done something, you have time to make sure they know that rather than in a classroom where they’re just moving on to the next day, whether or not the kids understand it. So there’s a lot of benefits to it.

And there’s just so many different ways it can look. Some people do a classical model is with homeschooling. There’s something called unschooling where it’s like the child is directing really what they do.

And there’s kind of everything in between. And it’s exciting. It can be overwhelming for parents.

But once you get into it and realize that it doesn’t have to look the same as your post school does, then I think that gives them a lot more confidence and feeling a lot more free to do it in different ways.

Brian Ledtke: Yeah. So you both mentioned the word overwhelmed. So what are some simple, realistic ways that parents can support their children without feeling overwhelmed?

Lauren May: So personally, one of the things that I do is I say each year I’m going to be the homeroom parent for one of my kids. That’s how I remain involved with their school so that I can be sure that I know what’s going on. I’m supporting the teachers.

I’m kind of like the coach for the teacher to say, what do you need? How can we do it? So thinking about what capacity do you or your wife have as a parent and how can that look in a school setting?

So it might be, could you be in some way support the teacher? Could you go and do a reading with the class once a week at 8 a.m. or help with centers? Teachers always need help.

So my biggest advice, if your kid is in daycare or in school, in a school setting would be talk to your teacher and say, I really want to help. Here’s my capacity. Here’s what I think I can do.

What should I do? I guarantee you, the first thing they’re going to say is read to your child every night and put them on a schedule because kids that are on a schedule do better in school. If they’re well rested, they do better, but definitely making sure that you spend time with your kid.

Ask them what they did in school. Ask them very explicit questions. What did you do today?

What went well? What was challenging? So that then you can re-teach if you need to something that was challenging.

But every parent should be asking their kids every day and demanding an answer. Don’t let them say, it was fine. You got to say, well, what was fine about it?

What did you like? What went well? Was there something that made you really happy?

Asking really explicit questions to get good answers from them.

Kimberlee Tucker: And on the opposite end, homeschooler, you’re teaching your children. You are seeing in real time what their weaknesses and strengths are. You are seeing, okay, we’re not getting multiplication.

We have the opportunity to stop, slow down, and really learn multiplication. We don’t have to keep up with standards. We don’t have to do what the school system says that 10 days is enough for this learning method and learning how to do multiplication.

We can spend six months on multiplication if that’s what’s needed. And that is only going to help the child have confidence and be able to move forward. And I tell parents all the time, if it takes six months to master multiplication, you’re not going to be six months behind.

Because if they have multiplication mastered, all the division is going to be very easy because division is nothing but multiplication reversed. And they’ll quickly catch up. So as a homeschool parent, you are, again, seeing in real time what is happening, where your deficits are.

And I think it’s amazing because it really creates no longer a huge need for standardized testing. Because you, as the parent, are seeing where the failures are and where the strengths are. And you don’t need to fill in the bubble to find that out.

Colleen Hroncich: And then kind of in between the full-time private school option or the homeschooling option, there’s things like micro schools and hybrid schools. So parents who are really intrigued by the idea of homeschooling and want to be more involved, that’s a route that they can look at. Because then anywhere from one or two to every day of the week, your child is going somewhere else to learn.

So you have that support. But they’re small and they’re very parent, very heavy parent involvement. And I’ll just say my kids are aged 19 to 26.

And it’s a blink of an eye, especially when they were in school. It was like the school year started and you turn around, the school year ended, and it’s like, what happened? Whereas once we started homeschooling, it did slow that down a lot.

And it gives you a lot more time to spend with your family. And so these hybrid options, I think, are really great for parents who were both parents are working to let them have a taste of it, at least, even if they can’t do full-time homeschooling.

Brian Ledtke: Yeah. So homeschooling is very intimidating to parents when they think about doing it, especially if you didn’t do well in school yourself, or you’re like, oh, I’m not a teacher. Well, how am I supposed to teach my child?

What are some supports out there for parents who want to start exploring homeschooling?

Colleen Hroncich: There’s never been a better time to diversify that between the resources on the internet and then just the growth of homeschooling and the growth of these school choice programs. There’s a lot of organizations that are doing things. There’s a lot of times Christian schools or other private schools will have out-of-cart classes that kids can take when they’re in high school, dual enrollment at colleges.

People start co-ops where it’s one or two days a week, maybe, of support. There’s online classes. So especially with higher math, that can be helpful.

It’s just, it’s phenomenal.

Lauren May: One of the things that I love in Florida is you can use your scholarship dollars to pay for PE classes. So we have several vendors who are people that sell their services who might have a homeschool basketball class at 9 a.m. on Mondays or 3 p.m. on Thursdays. And so you can find things that will work with your schedule, but allow your kids to be with other kids.

I think that’s really important. I mean, a lot of people, when they hear homeschooling, they think, oh, my kid is not going to be socialized. In today’s world, that is so inaccurate.

They will, there are so many options. They’re almost endless, which is why you need people like Kimberlee at The Homeschool Hype to have some navigators to say, your kid’s interested in soccer. Here’s some options.

Look here, here and here. This one’s all day. This one’s one hour.

This one, you know, and there’s so many choices, which is really neat. And I just recently met with someone who wants to start a basketball session for homeschool families in Florida. And so he was asking me tips and tricks.

How do I do it? And I said, I’m going to have to introduce you to some parents who homeschool because they’ll tell you what they want and what they need. And so it’s just a lot of community building, meeting people and talking to people that either are doing it or have done it.

And then really getting to know your kid and making sure that they’re being served well. Exactly.

Kimberlee Tucker: And the socialization is a myth. That is a big fat myth. I used to tell Sophia, we have to stay home today.

We have to do some school. We used to say we’re never at homeschoolers, not homeschoolers. Exactly, because it is the especially again, as homeschooling has exploded, there are opportunities around every corner.

There are resources and my website has resources for co-ops and just anything that you would need. We have a directory and I’m not the only one. I’m one of hundreds and hundreds of websites that are out there.

But I always tell my new families that they need to find their tribe. And sometimes that means you don’t have success at first because you might be in the wrong tribe. And I am a perfect example of that.

We tried about three tribes and I was it was not working. And the fourth one worked. And then that’s your tribe that you kind of do homeschool life with.

Or you can have three or four tribes. And also when new families come into my store, we you ask about like being overwhelmed. And yes, it can be very overwhelming.

So when new families come in, I have them focus on two subjects, math and language arts. And then we get a curriculum. We shop around the store.

We find curriculum that is going to be a perfect match. And then I tell them in two, two or three months, come back and let’s look at science. Come back and let’s look at history.

Because in homeschooling, you don’t have to do all of your core subjects at once. You can build on it. And also homeschooling, a wonderful part of being homeschooled is field trips and being able to go to a museum and see in person what is in your history textbook.

So a lot of families don’t need textbooks to do history or even science, especially at the younger ages. So I tell them to go on nature walks if they have little ones, go on nature walks, go to the Children’s Museum, go, you know, do all of these fun things that are relating.

Lauren May: And they’re learning. And so it’s sort of getting people out of the idea that you must learn from a book and you must sit down in a classroom and follow an exact schedule. That is not true at all.

And if you think back to what do you remember about your education? What are some of the best times that you had in school? A lot of mine were field trips and guest speakers.

I loved when people would come in, like if the like a state senator came in and talked to us, that was like my jam. I’m like, this is so cool. He’s famous.

And so funny how now I work with them, huh? It’s just interesting how you those are the things that you remember about your education. So when you’re homeschooling, you can build that out exactly for what your kid is interested in, what they like as you get to know them and as they grow up and they become more interested in certain things.

So I just think it’s really amazing. When I was in high school, I got to be a page at the Florida legislature. I will never forget that.

I loved that. I mean, literally, you just deliver messages back and forth. But I thought I was so cool.

So finding what works for your family is what is the most important. That’s what I love about choice states and our options in Florida is because you can do so many things for your kids.

Kimberlee Tucker: And you’re able to hone in on what their gifts and talents are and then also their passion. That’s one of the great things about homeschooling is it’s not surface learning. Again, mastery, and it’s taking a deep dive into areas of subject area and whatever subject area your child is passionate about.

Brian Ledtke: So I was homeschooled as well. And at 13, I was really interested in only two things. It was movies and writing. And so part of my school was my mom would take me to a movie and I was writing reviews for my local paper.

Lauren May: That’s cool to see.

Brian Ledtke: But that put me on a trajectory that I’m still writing today. But do you guys have examples where you’ve seen parent support completely change a student’s trajectory?

Kimberlee Tucker: Every day, we do. We do choice navigation every single day. And it’s life changing for the parents to be able to recognize and learn how they can make their homeschooling life for their child be a success.

And it’s not a blue book. And that’s kind of where I feel like a lot of times people get scared because there isn’t a blue book. There isn’t a book that we open up and say, you need to be doing this or this.

Because if you have a child who is gifted and talented, it’s going to look very different than a child that is just the average, you know, IQ child. And then you have the children that have exceptional needs. And so when a parent can grasp and understand all of the resources and the curriculum and the choices that are available to them and utilize them in a way that’s beneficial to the child, it’s wildly successful.

I don’t know that in 15 years of working in the homeschool industry that I’ve ever had a parent reach back out to me and say, this didn’t work. It is always positive. Oh, my gosh, thank you for helping us.

Thank you for guiding us this direction for success.

Lauren May: And we have a blog on our website, stepupforstudents.org, that has stories upon stories upon stories of families whose lives have changed because of the scholarship and because they realized that there were other options besides the typical school that many people go to. And that and I just want to be clear, government schools work really well for a lot of kids. And so I support those schools for the kids it works for.

But what I love to see is when a kid gets into the groove and they’re in the place that works. And so Sophia, her daughter, is a really good example. She was struggling in school.

She asked her mom to homeschool her. And now she’s 23 and doing amazing things. Thanks to her mom taking the brave step to leave her job and start homeschooling.

So I encourage anyone who’s thinking, man, maybe my child could do it, but I don’t know. I’m a little nervous. Contact somebody, start talking, start asking the questions, because it could truly change your life and the future for your child.

And I know that every child has the chance to change the world. And if they have the right educational setting, you’re setting them on the right path. So it’s amazing.

I love the work that we do. I love working with so many amazing families and people like Kimberlee and Colleen, who are so passionate about making sure every kid has options and is in the right place for them.

Kimberlee Tucker: You asked about examples. I vividly remember we were in our school room, which was actually just the guest bedroom. And we have a big picture window that slides open.

And she grabbed a book and said, I just need a break right now. And opened up the window and climbed out the window and went into her treehouse. And I thought, well, this is homeschooling.

That was like the moment that I went from teacher in the classroom to teacher as a homeschool mom.

Colleen Hroncich: I think it’s important for people to realize as they’re listening to this, we’re talking a lot about homeschooling, but navigation means more than homeschooling. It’s just looking at your whole field of options and recognizing that there is something out there that will work for your child. And if you don’t find it, you can create it.

And that can be a powerful thing, like what Kimberlee did with the Homeschool Hive. And so the first step might be Googling what’s available in your state. What are your state compulsory education laws?

Finding your homeschool group, finding micro schools. There’s the National Microschooling Center. There’s Kennesaw State University has hybrid.

A hybrid school center. And so the resources are out there. National School Choice Week has Navigate School Choice, which is a website that lists for different states, the different navigation helps that’s out there.

Feel free to reach out to any of us if that would be helpful. Just you can Google and find our emails. And you know, it’s just it’s exciting.

And you don’t want to look back and realize that you could have done more for your kids if you had just, you know, kind of taken the plunge. And don’t be afraid to take the plunge.

Kimberlee Tucker: I tell parents all the time that that if you’re an introvert, it’s time that you have to change for just a bit and become an extrovert because you have to get out there. People are not going to come to you. Resources are not just going to drop in your lap.

You might have to be uncomfortable in certain situations and get out there. But once you do, you have this massive amount of resources. I can tell you that a large percentage of the families that I deal with take co-op classes or they do hybrid.

I did that with my daughter. I am very weak in math. And so once she hit a certain age, it was like, I don’t, this is foreign.

And we found a co-op and that’s where she went.

Lauren May: But Kimberlee didn’t find out about that just in a dream. She had to go look for it and she found it. So I just encourage you guys, as you’re thinking about what to do, get out there.

The internet is so amazing. There’s so many things you can find online or you can find families that are doing it and ask them. But don’t be scared.

As Colleen said, sink or swim, I’m diving in. You can do it. And if you need any support, like she said, feel free to reach out.

Brian Ledtke: Absolutely. Well, thank you so much, Colleen and Kimberlee and Lauren for talking about parent support today. And we will see you guys on the next edition of EdChoice Chats.